No negative thoughts allowed..

I'm uptight. I'm faultfinding. I'm anxious. I'm unsteady. I'm...... wait! I'm not those things! They may be things I need improvement on or delivery from or whatever but those things do not make me who I am. I am a child of the most high God. I am righteousness. I am loved. I am cherished by my heavenly father. I am Jodi born in WV in 1970something and raised in Indiana... that's who I am.

Do you ever allow your circumstances to dictate who you are? Do you feel angry? Do you feel depressed? Do you feel not good enough? Do you feel like your always right or always wrong? Those feelings are just FEELINGS. They are not who you are. You are not angry you feel angry. You are not depressed you feel depressed. You are not always right you just feel you are...(see how I did that?) :)  We've got to take back our right as children from the royal blood line. We are not a victim of our human genealogy. We need to stop saying "well mom had it so I'll get it" or "3 of my family members deal with that so I'm bound to". We need to start speaking what we want instead of speaking about how we feel. Something like this "Father I thank you that I don't have to worry about the world around me because your Word says that although I am in this world I'm not of this world. Your word promises that you work everything out for good to those whom you love and I know you love me no matter what. Help me to trust you when my faith is failing. Help me to realize that I am powerless without you but because I have your spirit dwelling within me I can rest in that and know that you are for me and not against me. I won't consume my mind with news headlines or facebook posts but instead I will fill my mind and heart with your word and your godly counsel".
It doesn't take much to start the process of change in thoughts, behavior, actions, or words but it does take a lot to continue those behaviors. It's daily...heck it's every second that we need to focus on the good things of this world and of us and those around us.

The next time you hear your inner voice tell you you're nothing or worthless, that you're always stressed or broken, that you can't do this or won't finish that...prove that voice wrong and say the opposite. I am somebody and I am worth something. I don't have to live with stress or brokenness and I can prove that I will do that and finish this. The more you disagree with the negative the easier the positive will become.

Elevation Church - I Will Fight

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This video is exactly what I need to get me motivated each and every day and remind me who I am in Christ. I hope it encourages you too!

waiting on my breakthrough, you waiting too?

I'm hoping I can put into words what has happened to me within the past 24 hours. First I apologize for not posting in so long. My life as you will soon find out has been a little rocky. I vowed not to exploit  my personal life too much so I'll try and keep it vague but real and raw. So let's jump right in...

I met with someone from my church last night because I just needed to talk to someone and express emotions and fears and doubts that I have been struggling with for a very long time. So long in fact that it was starting to change my very character without me even realizing it. It was starting to change my posture and how I walked. My breathing was becoming shallow. I couldn't stop my mind from racing thoughts? (Does this sound familiar to anyone?) There is and has been so much going on that I thought I could handle and I realized last night that I can't. I can't control the what if's. I can't control those things which are uncontrollable. But what I can change is my knowledge of who Jesus is in my life. I can change where I put my trust and in whom I put it. I can decide each morning when I wake up that I'm going to surrender my whole heart and entire day to the Lord and whatever he has for me and trust that he's got it covered.

So back to this meeting. I won't go into detail but when I was finished blabbing about my issues the counselor just simply said she was going to allow the spirit to speak to me through her and man was she spot on! I felt things release from my body and I could breath again. I could take a deep breath without fearing I was going to explode my chest. (Don't laugh it's real when these things happen) I've decided to allow the voice of the Lord to speak louder than all of the other voices in my head. I walked out of that meeting with my head held high. My shoulders were back again and I could breath and take deep breaths. I smiled and it was genuine. I laughed at people's jokes and I even got to sing a little with the worship team (which will be another post in itself). I had breakthrough in that moment and it has changed me. I have hope that my life will be restored to what God intended it to be and how I have been living it wasn't and isn't part of his plan.

and then heres' the ...

I wish I could say that after that spiritual encounter that I'm a changed person and I was healed completely and everything is perfect now but I can't. Just this morning probably 2 hours ago I experienced a severe panic attack. I wasn't sure how to react or what to do. I felt like the air had just been knocked out of my entire soul. I just wanted to leave the office and go pull the covers over my head and sleep it off (like I've done so many times)... but this time was different. This time I said out loud "1 John 4:18 tells me that there is no fear in love and that perfect love cast out fear and Jesus is perfect" and that I shouldn't fear according to Isaiah 41:10 because God is with me. He will strengthen me and help me. He will uphold me in his righteous right hand. James 5:16 reminds me that the earnest prayer of a righteous person has great power and produces wonderful results and the one I loved so much is this " Behold, I am doing a new thing; now it springs forth, do you not perceive it? Isaiah 43:19. God is doing a new thing in me!!! In the midst of one of the worst attacks I heard the voice of my Father God above all others. He's working in me to will and to do what he wants!! Of course there is going to be opposition from the enemy. He doesn't want my breakthrough but too bad!! I know God does!
Sometimes people experience their breakthrough right away and some it may take longer. But I'm going to stand on Isaiah 43:19 that promises me that God is doing a new thing! No matter how long it takes I will wait. Strength will rise when I wait on him. Peace will never leave me. God will not forsake me. I could go on and on and on.

I want this to be the beginning of my journey to complete wholeness and newness is Christ. One thing that the counselor said in our meeting is that God is going to show me new things and my relationship with him moving forward is going to be different and I'm ready for different. I'm ready for new. I'm ready for a fresh revelation.

I hope you will follow me on this journey. Pray for me and if you need prayer let me know! I love to pray for people!! I want to see God lifted high in this process and I know he will be. He works everything out for good! His word says so!

**If you struggle with anxiety let me pray for you. I'll put your name on my prayer list and lift you up each day. I vow to do that for you. I know first hand the deep dark places anxiety can take you if you let it. Let's group together and defeat satan and his schemes to overtake God's children with his lies. We are mighty warriors and able to break down strongholds. We just have to come together and believe in each other and win the battle in our minds!!

Jodi Shavon